Thursday, October 26, 2006
We must save our own souls
We must save our own souls, because the chances of my generation, and those that follow, learning anything of substance from our elders, our leaders, and most of our peers, is a longshot at best. We are in effect being forced to relearn old lessons, as our predecessor’s disrespect of history has put us in a position to once again relive it. Spiritually vacant, morally hollow, and motivationally empty, our elders have failed us and themselves. Not only have they failed, they have damaged our culture and crippled our chances for prosperity through their failings. Of course, this is all my opinion, an opinion formed through general observation and experience, not focused research and hard numbers, so it could be a completely invalid viewpoint. Be that as it may, this is my blog and I will rant if I want to. :)
First, our elders: Think about the role elders have played in most civilizations. They have historically been the standard bearers, the storytellers, the teachers, the mentors, and the examples for successive generations to follow. At one point in its history, America had elders that filled this role, for better or worse. I could go back to the founding fathers and run through examples of tradition, the positives and negatives, the ups and downs, but who wants to read all of that? Skip a century or so, and you arrive at the first half of the 20th century. The first fifty years of the most tumultuous century in US history was filled with examples of hardship, sacrifice, and overcoming. From those who weathered the Civil War as children, saw the end of slavery, and sought to move America forward at the turn of the century, to those who fought for social change in the 20s, survived the Great Depression, and were asked to fight and die in World War II. These people lived hard lives, but learned the principles of survival, the value of work, and a sense of duty. They had elders to teach them, and life experience to refine them.
Fast forward 60 years, and we find ourselves burdened with a large number of elders who are incapable of filling any purposeful role, beyond that of consumers and dependents. Instead of growing old with grace, sharing the wisdom only experience and time can show us, they load up on Viagra, head to the plastic surgeon’s office, visit therapists, file for divorce, live on television, and seek to perpetually extend their romanticized adolescence. A small minority of our seniors have anything worth passing on to the next generation, because so few have gained any real wisdom as they have grown physically older. They are the generation that inherited America from those who fought World War II. We call them Baby Boomers, but their demographic has been more of a bust. Granted, they have had their social and economic successes, but even in success, they have found ways to fail. The gap between rich and poor in this country is now wider than it has ever been. Racism is not dead, but the Civil Rights movement made significant strides. Unfortunately, most of that progress was made by people who are no longer with us. In many ways, their politics and ethics have nearly destroyed the middle class, either through greed(junk bonds, Enron, WorldCom, etc), sloth(neglecting their own retirement, growing obsolete in the workplace, failing to be involved in their own governance, etc), or plain stupidity(see just about everything else, from the onslaught of drug use to the mainstreaming of promiscuity, and the subsequent rise in crime and disease).
These are the people who discarded the traditions of their parents, embraced the myth that better living through chemistry was a plausible reality, waged war on the concepts of marriage and family, diluted the meaning of love, and made greed good. They burdened us with a potentially crippling national debt, have become a massive Social Security obligation, and have left a diseased government for their children to deal with. They are predominantly overweight, politically ignorant (save issues tied to Social Security and Medicare, of course), and are more worried about their comforts than their legacy. In many ways, the story they have written is one of self gratification, shortsightedness, lost opportunity, and wasted potential. We still make war, our family units are falling apart, love has become something of a running joke, the phrase “American values” has become an oxymoron, our “happiness” is more dependent on chemicals than ever, and our collective purpose is more about consumerism and exploitation, than growing a genuine, unified, culture of togetherness. Boomers are the hippy generation. They have systematically destroyed most of the traditions that had been established for them, while simultaneously betraying nearly every ideal that compelled them to destroy said traditions in the first place. In effect, they are left with nothing of real importance. Some of them are wealthy beyond their wildest dreams, but most have financial trouble and uncertainty ahead of them. Most damaging of all will be their legacy of displaced blame. The fault was always with the politicians, their parents, their neighbors, the other guy’s kids, the executives, anyone, but themselves.
They are the “me” generation, and they refuse to take personal responsibility for what has happened to the country they inherited. In the 1950s, they were handed a nation full of optimism. It was not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, in fact it was in need of a major dose of reality and social fairness, but it was an optimistic place. Fifty years later, you would be hard-pressed to find someone who does not have grave concerns about some aspect of modern America. That optimism has been replaced by cynicism, that sense of possibility reduced to sarcasm and apathy. Shitting away all of that potential and optimism in less than 60 years is no small feat. Obviously, some of what has happened was beyond their control, but there is no denying the role their generation has played in the dissolution of Americana.
Next up, a rant about our leadership, who are not necessarily our elders…hooray!
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would not the world war two generation you've lauded be to blame for producing such bankrupt progeny?
Absolutely. They are fully responsible. Without an extensive background in research sociology, my guess would be that their desire to give their kids everything they could want, while shielding them from the realities of existence, led to an overriding sense of entitlement. The generation that gave us the sexual revolution and better living through chemistry were the sons and daughters of genuine heros and heroines. Sadly, they took that legacy and gave us the STD explosion, the modern drug epidemic, fractured homes, withering spirituality, and obsessive materialism. What's the lesson? An easy life is not necessarily a good one. Sheltering these kids, while reproducing like rabbits, produced a generation that has done more harm than good to the American social structure. The "why" behind all of that is beyond me, but I think it is pretty obvious that it is real, on some level.
First I need to apologize for my rambling and getting off the subject…5 weeks on bed rest in the hospital has destroyed my brain.
Erik, I do agree. Our generation as well as our parent’s has lost all sight of values, honor, integrity, spirituality, family...I could go on and on. Obviously this has taken a huge toll on this country.
People today are overspending, living paycheck to paycheck, and dropping 40-60 bucks per night if not more at the bars without any regard for their future or their children’s. I can't speak for everyone, but I know my parents didn't teach me the value of the dollar. They bought their toys and took out a loan in order to get them or put them on a credit card. I have had to learn the hard way what overspending can do, and now toys are only bought if we can pay cash (notice your brother still doesn’t have a motorcycle in the garage). The good news is that we're not all acting this way and if we once did we are learning from our mistakes. We don't need to rely on the generation before us, we need to take charge, be independent and learn for ourselves. Scott and I would love to have new cars, the best clothing, and be able to go out whenever we wanted, but we've learned that we can still have nice cars, nice clothing and a fun social life and still put money in savings every month, invest money every month and set ourselves up for the future without depending on someone to rescue us or support us. And...we manage to do this on one income. I would rather have an older car and be able to take my children on a family vacation every year without having to put one penny on a credit card.
I look back at pictures of my grandparents, the life they had, how hard they worked, how much they enjoyed spending time at home with their family and truly loving one another. I can only hope Scott and I can have that kind of life with our children. On both sides of our family we didn't have the "best" family life to accomplish this but I think we both know what we missed out on and what we want our girls to have. I of course had drinking, cheating, fighting, hatred and divorce growing up and from what Scott has told me he had parents who lived on separate sides of the house who joined for dinner and were content to be married and have children but never went the extra mile to be truly happy and in love. This country needs to get back to having a good home life, dinner at the table without the TV on, spending quality time together on the weekends, helping their children sit down and do their homework, teaching their children how to have fun in the back yard with what nature has to offer rather than having to buy them the biggest swing set in the neighborhood or a 4wd vehicle for a child that hasn't even learned how to pedal yet.
We rely so much on technology, other people and the government that we have forgotten how to take care of ourselves. As soon as something doesn’t go our way, the same people we have relied on to do everything for us we then blame for doing it wrong. We need to step up to the plate and change things in our own households before we can ever expect the government or the country to make a change. I still have hope that I'm not alone in thinking this can happen. First and foremost the government needs to have stricter rules for welfare and food stamps and only give to those who are truly in hard times but trying to find their way. We have way to many people relying on the government to pay for their laziness and lack of birth control. These people need to step up and start taking responsibility for our own actions.
I do see light at the end of the tunnel:
-We have a 100% all volunteer military filled with people willing to serve their country, they may not always like it and they may get out knowing it wasn't for them but they were still willing to die to save someone else.
-More and more parents are starting to spend quality time with their children at home.
-Our generation is starting to get involved in politics, although I think they are undereducated on the matters, at least it’s a start and hopefully someday they will embrace it enough to really study the issues before making a decision.
-In time, I think the overspending will slow down.
Holy crap, your reply is nearly as long as my original post! You must really be bored. ;)
I've made certain sacrifices in order to be able to spend what I want, when I want, while still investing, but I do agree that a majority of America's middle class seems to be living beyond their means.
Our homelife may not have been ideal, but we had it easy compared to some people I have known. You know I have some issues in the relationship department, I write about them here all the time, and some of that is due to what I learned at home. That said, some of it is the result of how drastically fucked up much of the local world's approach to love and relationships has become. It's an interesting contrast, because Scott and I were raised in an environment of relative stability, but as you stated, there was not that sense of connection. Honesty, caring, loyalty I can do. The touchy-feely, romantic thing, on the other hand, is something I will probably not ever be very good at. None of us will ever be perfect, no matter what the Baby Boomers' legion of therapists would have us believe!
In many ways, our parents' generation totally destroyed any notion we may have had about ideal families. Where they had the Leave It To Beaver mythology, we were raised in a world where such an ideal was seen as a joke and a lie. A majority of the people I know are so cynical, and I absolutely include myself in this, that many may be incapable of recognizing a healthy, happy relationship, should they be lucky enough to find one!
Dysfunction is the new normal, and people are so caught up in it, that they have becomce blind to what is right in front of their eyes.
And I think much of that ties into the sexual revolution and the repercussions it has had in our society. Love became cheap and easy, it's meaning diminished and diluted. The freelove generation wanted to have their cake and eat it too. They dreamt of Leave It To Beaver, but didn't want to put in the work to make it a reality. They had been handed everything that their parents had to work for, and subsequently took it all for granted. They began to believe that they were entitled to happiness, wealth, and stability, when in reality these are all things that have to be fought for through disciplined effort and purposeful action. Basically, it's the same argument you are making.
I think it is only natural that our generation and the one following us would make it worse. Baby Boomers are still blaming everyone but themselves for every problem they have created during their 30 or so years of dominance in this culture. As a result, their offspring have learned to do the same. The Boomers whine about the disrespect they receive from modern youth, even though they too showed the same disrespect to their elders not so long ago.
I could go on and on, but you get the point. I hope you're right about the turnaround, as I am most definitely worried about the world your little girls are going to grow up in.