Monday, February 19, 2007
CNN.com Suckles Dog Testicles
I've been a long-time CNN.com reader, primarily because other news outlets have historically been prone to sensationalism and lack of focus. There's no valid argument for reading Foxnews.com, unless you are white/male/Republican, or some combination thereof. The regulars nets rarely have anything interesting to share beyond AP articles, and I can't find an unbiased, informative print rag that suits my tastes. CNN has been sliding for a long time, but they have finally hit bottom and I just can't stand sifting through the shyte in search of something worth reading.
What finally put me over the edge? First, the Anna Nicole Smith story. Why ANYONE cares about the death of a drug addicted cumdumpster is beyond me. Anna Nicole was so promiscuous that half the males living in Texas and most of California could be put on the potential-baby-daddy list. This woman managed to play host to more male genitalia than Fruit of the Loom, and she was more into drugs than CVS, but we're supposed to care that she's dead? Apparently so, because CNN ran a frontpage article, which remained featured for days. Once it had lost feature cred, it was moved to a sidebar, where it remained for days (more than a week?), before becoming a sidebar in Entertainment section features, where it remains.
Making matters worse, Britney Spears' head shaving was front page material all week, including two video links, one to a report on the shaving itself, the other an interview with Spears' stylist, who apparently pleaded with everyone's favorite trailer queen to stop. Alas, Britney didn't listen, and the news item floated on CNN's homepage all weekend.
Maybe CNN is not to blame. After all, they are only giving the people what they want, right? I would be curious to see what the click-through numbers are on the aforementioned links, as I find it highly unlikely that Anna Nicole Smith and Britney Spears really are what America wants. No one I know cares about either of them. Everyone I know approached Anna Nicole Smith's death with either complete disinterest or some variation of "what took so long?". I am fairly confident that all of these people would regard Britney Spears passing in much the same light, so I can't imagine any of them give a single, solitary shit about her shaving her head! We're talking about a washed up pop star who only became famous because of her slutty-young-trash looks and mystifying, wholesome image, both of which completely abandoned her. Britney's only claim to fame these days is having divorced a white trash nobody who bilked her out of millions, after knocking her up twice, taking away her number one asset in the process.
Between Anna Nicole and Britney, I can't decide who is more irrelevant. According to CNN, they are priority news items and I can't think of more powerful evidence that the company has finally lost all sense of perspective. I can go elsewhere for AP articles and 24 hour news updates.
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