Saturday, March 10, 2007
And that's enough of the whining
So I'm lonely, frustrated, and stressed...when I put life in those simple terms, I see that I am no different than a million other poor bastards out there. Therefore, the whining has to stop and it has to stop now.
In the spirit of my return to functionality, I wanted to write a little about art. Art, in the form of 2D drawing, painting, etc, has been a part of my life since I was 5 or 6 years old. I started like most artists do, with poorly drawn stick figures depicting my family and friends. It wasn't long before I started dabbling in tanks, airplanes, and soldiers, then cars, buildings, so on and so forth. By the time I reached middle school, my artistic energies were devoted primarily to cartooning, with a focus on comic book characters and movie monsters.
Drawing was little more than a pastime for me through high school. I was arguably "talented", though probably not gifted. Creating became something I did instead of taking notes in class or finishing homework at home, but it wasn't my focus. I would draw in the afternoons while waiting to play football, or on weekends when no one else was available. The problem may have been that it came easily to me, so I didn't see the challenges and let my attention wander, or perhaps I took it for granted and neglected my own development. Whatever the case, when it came time to graduate high school, I found myself with a fairly weak portfolio, a pessimistic attitude toward my work, and a dwindling desire to do much of anything but sit as a passenger and let life take me where it willed.
I put art down almost completely at that point. After Christmas-treeing the math section of my SAT, I decided to apply to UF for shits and giggles as much as anything else. Maybe I wanted to pretend I had further ambitions beyond high school and Junior College...at this point, I'm no longer sure. There really wasn't any purpose in my applying, as UF's art program was nothing compared to Ringling's or even Eckerd's, both of which are closer to home. Those schools are private, and therefore very expensive. They are also highly selective, as their student bodies are historically very small. I saw no hope of getting into either one of them, given my weak portfolio, so I refused to even submit an application. It was no great surprise that UF denied my request for entry. My SAT was awful (around 1100, if memory serves), though I did manage a 29 or something similar on my ACT. I had no volunteer time on my resume, no real desire to actually attend the school, and no self-confidence to speak of. Going to UF would have been a disaster and it is probably best that I was not deemed worthy of attending the institution.
Fast forward 10 years and things had changed drastically. Art was still not a focus, but I had learned to have a much higher appreciation for what it meant to have creative ability. I had studied the greats of the Renaissance and Baroque, being held in awe by the marvels of Michelangelo, Da Vinci, Bernini, and Bosch. I came to love Rembrandt, Dali, and lesser known commercial artists like Boris Vallejo, Micheal Whelan, and Luis Royo. My eyes were opened to the fact that the arts and the creative process were the true measures of civilization. How many people will remember Michael Jordan and Tiger Woods 500 years from now? How many will know Michelangelo and Da Vinci, or Mozart and Beethoven, or even Aristotle and Homer? Leading the NBA in career scoring and having a shoe line named after you is nothing compared to creating the Sistine Chapel ceiling frescoes, or composing Beethoven's Fifth.
Our modern heroes are nothing but entertainers. What historical significance does Tiger Woods winning another PGA tour event really have? What commentary will his career make, beyond serving as a chronicle of the sociological ridiculousness in paying a man millions of dollars to play a game no more dangerous than strolling through a park? Some would say that perfecting the techniques of his game is an art form in and of itself, and there's certainly some merit in the idea, but winning a game is not the same as actually creating something tangible. In the end, I have more respect for the craftsman than the entertainer.
Art is something different, in that it is something which has been a part of our species since before time was time. Great music, paintings, sculptures, architecture, etc, stand the test of eons. The Great Wall, Egypt's pyramids, the Sistine Chapel, the architecture of Ancient Greece and Rome - these are all artistic creations that serve as historical benchmarks. As these thoughts formulated and settled in my mind, I came to realize how important my old pastime really was in the scope of human history. While I cannot claim to be on the level of history's greats, I do have a connection, in that I too can create. That is not something to be taken lightly and most definitely not something to be neglected.
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I'm glad that you're going back to your roots and finding something positive to focus on.
The most appealing aspect of creating something is that it gives us a medium through which to exorcise the thoughts that batter our spirits. I'm in the process of doing just that in fact, and not a day too soon! lol